Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Garbage Garbage Rules

Welcome to your new life in Japan.
Here are the rules:

Note: I'm not entirely sure if the rules above apply to our city, but the image is still a good example at how ridiculous of an effort it is to "properly" dispose of your garbge.

If you fail to follow each and everyone of these rules you WILL die... a slow painful death called global warming.  Further, the old Japanese lady will monitor your trash that you have placed outside and beat you with a stick next time she sees you doing it wrong.  Seriously, I walked past an old man one night and he saw my garbage bags.  His first reaction was to flash a glance at my foreign face and then he proceeded to make an inventory of all the items that were in the colored bags. I didn't see his reaction but I can only imagine it wasn't a pleasant one. 

Here's our example:

God knows that these drawers/cupboards/cabinets could be utilized for more important things... maybe like the rest of our shit that doesn't fit anywhere else because Japanese domiciles are so damn small.  No, I'm kidding we have tons of room, but damn these places are small.

If there was one thing in my life that I could care less about it's garbage. I mean, its name, in it and of itself, implies its importance. Don't get me wrong, I'm by no means a litter-er, but when I'm done with something I'd very much like to rid myself of it... immediately...just like how I deal with my women... Hahah, okay, not that, but maybe that too (In my defense, I never said women were akin to garbage though).

I digress.  No one wants to deal with their own dirty work more than flushing the toilet, washing dishes, or calling mom to do their own laundry, but damn Japan I laud you for your efforts.

I understand the reason for such tedious garbage measures is that Japan has very limited real estate and that burning garbage/ recycling is an important part in saving landfills (if they even have any), unicorns, and contributing less to global warming.  Honestly, I really have no idea why the Japanese make this garbage thing such an ideal nor have I done any research on it (do it yourself).

The one thing I can say about this whole garbage ordeal is that it annoying as F to carry around garbage with you in your pockets because there are NO public fucking trashcans. With that said let it be known that this trash in my pockets came from somewhere... that somewhere being the food that I just ate while walking. F you Japanese customs!! No, I'm kiding. I'm actually very sorry. That's embarrassing.

Up next: Talking shit on this whole not eating in public thing.


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